The reason I ask you to watch it first is that it's definitely more attractive than anything we're doing. The truth is we don't have a video. We don't really have anything that encapsulates what we're doing; what we've been doing over the last nine months. We haven't worked out statistics and in truth we don't need them; I'm sure the video alone convinces you that the church is alive and that we really are part of a generation striving, living for justice. For those of you who have never heard of Hillsong. It is a church in Australia and the band you just saw are not a pop band they are infact the amazing worship team that lead the Hillsong congregation in song and spirit every Sunday.
Unlike the band Lorna and I have never stood infront of crowds of thousands. We love the people we meet but we are yet to see the day we join with thousands of youths jumping in time to the songs on our hearts. We have never spoken under lights to fans. We don't use a great deal of equipment and (sadly) we don't have a film crew. Our footage consists of us filming each other. It is freshly amateur but equally as powerful.
Why am I making a relation between Soul Touch and Hillsong Australia? No, despite what you might be thinking, it is not to make you feel sorry for us. We would not swap our journey for all the concerts in the world. We don't even want you to make a comparison. We'd much rather you join with us in seeing the relationships and many similarities we actually share. As I watch the clip I am excited about the similarities, focusing directly on the possibility for partnership rather than furthering distance.
You may look at them and see a band. You probably recognise, as I do, their amazing talent. You see packed arenas, fields full of young people and good looking boys (well some of you might have noticed that). When you look at us what do you see? I see two girls self financing a mission’s trip around the world, wearing the same clothes they have been wearing for the past nine months (trust me, flick back though the pictures and count the times the red poco-dot top appears!). I see two girls standing infront of small congregations, talking to tiny crowds; to one or two people. Correct!? Yes. You'd be correct and we love every second of it.
I'm not going to lie there are times, like today, when we see clips such as the one above and we wonder why. We ask God: are we on the right track? Are we in the right place? Should we be doing something differently? Comparisons are easy to make when you see the "success" or obvious anointing on others. Simultaneously doubt creeps in. (Be self controlled and alert. Your enemy- the devil- prowls around you like a lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him standing firm in your faith because you know brothers throughout the earth are undergoing the same kind of suffering. 1 Peter 4:8-)
Thankfully the comparison is fleeting and we return to the comfort of knowing and recognising our job and the importance of us doing it right. Previously I spoke about the small favela church we visited in Brazil. You probably laughed imaging us waving arms and legs about trying to portray the body of Christ (the church) whilst convincing them they have a part to play in it. I mentioned how frustrating it felt when they looked back on us unphased. There is no doubt they were excited about having visitors, they were more than hospitable and fun to be with. My frustration however was stirred by the realization that they (peharps) did not look upon themselves with the unbelievable importance or relevance that I saw in them, or that God sees in them. I make that assumption because they, like us, are surrounded by people more obviously blessed, or in at least in terms of how the world measures success: numbers, money, members, designer clothes…you know the list. That particular Sunday 1 Corinthians 12 was the scripture on our hearts and the one we chose to share with the congregation gathered in the humble favela church. It's a scripture that today I am reminded of. Read it again with me:
There are different kinds of service but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of gifts but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working but the same God works in all of them in all men. Now to each one the manifestation of the spirit is given for the common good. 1 Cor 4-7Thankfully this scripture reminds us that we are each made with a purpose. Notice it says "all men". That doesn't mean he left some people out without any gifts. It means he has given each one of us gifts. He has given each one of us a purpose that only we can fulfill. I repeat for those of you who have overdosed on chocolate eggs this morning and are not concentrating: God has given you a special gift, a purpose noone can fulfill except you.
I know that telling some of you this is old news you're already living, lavishing, practicing, demonstrating the gifts God has given you. Good Job! Equally there are those of you who this morning got up and immediately, instead of looking in the mirror and seeing your gifts or asking God to show you yours, you set about being annoyed at everyone else whose gifts are more immediately evident. Perhaps that's a bit harsh. Maybe you're not annoyed at them. Worse still maybe you're annoyed at God for not showing you yours. My guess is that it's infact the complete opposite. God has shown you yours and you are dissatisfied. (Be honest it's only you and God right now, well and me whose kinda gate crashed the occasion) "But that gift doesn't come with bright lights" you think subconsciously- obviously you would never share this thought with others for fear of them thinking you vain, ridiculous or ridiculously vain. "But my gift doesn't enable me to score goals or warrant any accolade from my family and friends. My gift doesn't require me to pack up my job and fly around the world. It isn't noticed by man! Aha. Sound familiar. It's ok you can agree the only reason I am able to write about such things is that I have experienced that emotion; that ridiculously vanity.
What's more I have been rescued from it. Yes, "rescued" as in plural! This worldly emotion creeps in regularly to our spirits, which would otherwise be joyful. It births its ugly, unfruitful head on occasions like today when innocently Lorna and I went to the internet to see if we had any messages or if any wee miracles had happened as we slept. We didn't and so instead of reveling in the blessings we do have: an amazing family, both here in Scotland and several who have adopted us around the world, health, each other (I won't bore you; the list is long! We set about reminding ourselves in our inadequacies.
I don't know how you are feeling right now, where you are or what makes you feel inadequate. I do know how I was feeling this morning though and how sweet Lorna felt as we prayed together: discouraged, especially as we watched the film clip. But why? Why would we be discouraged by others achievements? No not necessarily because of jealously. We want others to do well. I think it is simply because sometimes seeing others success can remind us of our lack of it.
What gives us confidence now though is knowing that the feeling of inadequacy does not come from God. It comes from the comparisons we make with ourselves and others: "But who are you, O man, to talk back to God?" Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, "why did you make me like this?" Romans 9:20-20
There are plenty girls cleverer than us, prettier than us, more technically minded than us who could go around the world visiting the churches we are visiting. But what would be the point in that. That is the job God has given us. Just as he doesn't need us to be on the stage singing with Hillsong. They are doing that job and doing it wonderfully I might add!
We each have a job and as we told the children in the Favela church if we don't do our job it means that a part of the church is missing. (For we are all members of one body Ephesians 4:25)
Whether it big or whether it is small if it is incomplete that effects us all.
(Spot check: In making ourselves feel better we (we're all in this) must make sure we never put those around us down. "But never let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs." Ephesians 4:29 It's something that is sometimes so easy to do and often we do not recognise we are doing it but seriously it's dangerous game. You putting them down is stalling them completing the work they have to do for the kingdom. So in short you’re actually adding to your own misery)
This week Lorna and I visited a small house group attended by five young Bolivian men (University students), a Brazilian missionary, an Irish man (Chris Mc..., Chris is Irish, 29 years old and has been serving God in Bolivia for the past two years as short terms missions co-coordinator for Latin Link) and a beautiful English couple, Ruth and Dean who moved here six months ago, giving up their jobs (Ruth as Teacher and Dean as Interior Designer...I hope I'm correct about that) to be missionaries here in Bolivia.
We read together; some in Spanish, one in Portuguese and some in English, the story of Moses in Exodus. The story of a man famous for what he achieved. Even non Christians know him as "that man that parted the sea". Moses is not famous for the moments he spent with God asking why and how: "What if they do not believe me or listen to me and say, 'The Lord did not appear to you'?" Exodos 4: 1
Nor is he famous for the moments he felt completely inadequate but that does not mean he did not go through them. Moses asked God: "Who am I, that I should go to the Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?" Exodos 3: 11
I pray that today, this Easter weekend, the day that we remember what Jesus did, that you would recognise that he did it for you too. Not just for your neighbor who you think is doing better: the woman who is coping with all her children flawlessly (she never has tomato sauce down her front, she never looks tired and she even has time to go to the gym!). Not only for the guy at your work who is serving God and managing to remain sane. Jesus did not only die for the clever girl who sits at the front of the class, surrounded by adoring boys and passes all the exams with A's or for the pastor who preaches to two thousand congregants while you faithfully disciple two hundred. Yes these are achievements. These are things that can be easily identified by the world. And so I suppose I write this as an encouragement but also as a little reminder to ourselves that God sees our efforts. He sees your efforts and that no amount of praise or accolade from man will ever be able to satisfy you the way his reward will:
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6: 9Finally, as Lorna and I get over our wee "ridiculously vain" moment, we are able to focus on the extravagant amounts of similarities we have with the guys in the video. First off we are good looking (big joke) secondly we're all running the same race: we all crave to see justice here on earth and will not rest until it is completed (Phil 1:6) and lastly the biggest desire of all our hearts, the Auzy boys and the Soul Touchers, is that you would join us in this race and recognise how vital a part you have to play in ushering in the Kingdom of heaven. Each of us, including Moses, began our journey the same way, it started with a response: "Here I am!"
You are amazing because God made you that way. Who are we to argue!
Happy Easter to you!
Many, many blessings Erica xxx
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